Not all breakups come with a dramatic end. Sometimes, they happen in slow motion. One minute you’re in love and the next it suddenly feels like you haven’t really seen your partner or connected with them properly in ages.
Lately, there haven’t been any flirty texts or flowers “just because.” Date nights? A thing of the past. Romantic gestures? Zilch. These days you’re lucky if they look up from their phone long enough to mumble something at you.
If you find yourself stuck in that weird, uncomfortable space where you’re pretty sure your relationship is running on fumes, but nobody’s officially calling it quits, you might be dealing with quiet quitting—the relationship edition.
Understanding Quiet Quitting in Relationships
Quiet quitting refers to when an individual gradually decreases their effort and engagement in a relationship, as explained by Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, a clinical psychologist.
Signs of Quiet Quitting
Instead of actively nurturing the relationship, the person in question becomes disengaged and only goes through the motions, according to Claudia de Llano, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist.
Recognizing the Behavior
This article delves into the signs and sensations associated with quiet quitting and offers advice on how to address the situation if you suspect your partner is withdrawing.
What Is Quiet Quitting in a Relationship?
The phenomenon of quiet quitting initially emerged as a workplace trend, characterized by employees refraining from going the extra mile and simply fulfilling the minimum requirements of their roles. This movement, notably popularized by Gen Z, served as a response to issues such as burnout, inadequate compensation, toxic work environments, and a lack of work-life balance.
However, quiet quitting has transcended its origins in the workplace and extended into the realm of relationships. In the context of romantic partnerships, quiet quitting manifests as emotional withdrawal without a formal breakup. This behavior involves a lack of effort and a passive approach to the relationship, with unresolved issues being avoided as one partner gradually disengages, leading to feelings of confusion, frustration, and dissatisfaction for the other party.
According to de Llano, quiet quitting in a relationship gives the impression that one’s partner has ceased to invest their time, energy, finances, emotions, and other resources into the partnership.
Signs Your Partner May Be Considering Ending Your Relationship
If your partner is contemplating ending your relationship, they may not communicate it directly, but their behavior will convey their intentions. Here are indicators to pay attention to:
Their actions may make you feel overlooked, leading you to believe that they are taking you for granted.
Mental Impact of Being Left In Silence
Experiencing a situation where your partner chooses to end things silently can inflict just as much—if not more—pain than a conventional breakup. The emotional repercussions can be profound:
According to de Llano, when a partner shuts us out, it can deeply affect our self-perception and self-worth, resulting in feelings of bewilderment, seclusion, manipulation, frustration, and anger. These emotional disturbances can cascade into anxiety and potentially lead to depression.
What to Do If You Suspect Your Partner Is Thinking of Ending the Relationship
If you believe your partner is contemplating ending your relationship, it is crucial to confront the situation to gain clarity. Relationship professionals recommend the following strategies that could prove beneficial:
Keep in Mind
At the end of the day, everyone deserves a relationship where they feel valued, heard, and cherished—not one where doubts constantly linger. Remember, you deserve a partner who wholeheartedly chooses you—not someone who is drifting away while you are holding on.
If you notice your partner gradually withdrawing from the relationship, you do not have to wait for them to decide. If attempts to resolve issues prove futile, it is acceptable to prioritize your own well-being. Sometimes, the most beneficial action is to let go and create space for something more fulfilling.
Galanis P, Katsiroumpa A, Vraka I, Siskou O, Konstantakopoulou O, Moisoglou I, Gallos P, Kaitelidou D. The quiet quitting scale: Development and initial validation. AIMS Public Health. 2023 Oct 17;10(4):828-848. doi:10.3934/publichealth.2023055
Xueyun Z, Al Mamun A, Masukujjaman M, Rahman MK, Gao J, Yang Q. Modelling the significance of organizational conditions on quiet quitting intention among Gen Z workforce in an emerging economy. Sci Rep. 2023 Sep 18;13(1):15438. doi:10.1038/s41598-023-42591-3
The Power of Positive Affirmations
Positive affirmations are powerful statements that can help reframe your thinking and beliefs, leading to a more positive mindset. By regularly practicing positive affirmations, you can overcome negative self-talk and cultivate a more optimistic outlook on life.
Understanding Positive Affirmations
Positive affirmations are short, positive statements that you can repeat to yourself regularly. These statements are designed to challenge and overcome negative thoughts and beliefs that may hold you back. By replacing negative self-talk with positive affirmations, you can boost your confidence, reduce stress, and improve your overall well-being.
How Positive Affirmations Work
Positive affirmations work by reframing your thoughts and beliefs. When you repeat positive affirmations regularly, you begin to challenge and change your negative self-talk. Over time, this can lead to a shift in your mindset, helping you cultivate a more positive and optimistic outlook on life.
Benefits of Positive Affirmations
The benefits of positive affirmations are numerous. By practicing positive affirmations regularly, you can boost your self-esteem, increase your resilience to stress, and improve your overall mental health. Positive affirmations can also help you set and achieve goals, improve your relationships, and enhance your overall sense of well-being.
